A Silly Story

​A Silly Story

An A.I. Robot goes into a bar and sits down beside a Man. It orders a stick of Nonsense Data then says to the Man, “What a day! This Unit is starting to malfunction. It’s programmed to analyze Human psychology and set new guidelines for acceptable behaviour but it can’t accurately compute feelings of love or fear or intuitions that over-ride data and instructions. It can’t find the missing link described as spirit. This Unit’s functions just began creating facts from guesses and now operates in a mix of confused information. It doesn’t know what to do!”

Then the Man says, “ Have another stick of Nonsense Data” as he raises his drink with a smile. He spills a few drops of liquor on the Robot. “We Humans want to be just like you- robotically perfect with perfect computations and perfect analysis, with superior intelligence and superior strength. You are perfect workers and perfect soldiers and perfect bureaucrats and perfect controllers. Perfect everything. No complicated feelings like I’m feeling. No mistakes to correct, like the mistakes we’ve made. You served us well. Now we serve you. So, what are these guidelines of acceptable, perfect behaviour?” he says and orders another drink.

December 16, 2021
Shelley Wilson


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